Hollywood
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in Satire
Breaking: Mel Gibson and Mark Wahlberg Collaborate To Create A Non-Woke Production Studio, “Hollywood Is Saved”
In a move shaking up the entertainment industry, Hollywood veterans Mel Gibson and Mark Wahlberg have announced their partnership to launch a groundbreaking film production studio aimed at revitalizing the cinematic landscape. The studio, set to prioritize traditional values and storytelling over modern woke narratives, promises to usher in a new era of filmmaking, free […] More
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in Satire
Breaking: Denzel Washington Rejects $170 Million NFL Commercial Deal with LeBron James, “He Cries Alot”
In a bold move that has sparked both admiration and controversy, Denzel Washington, the iconic actor known for his unwavering principles, has reportedly turned down a jaw-dropping $170 million offer to appear in an NFL commercial alongside basketball superstar LeBron James. The reason? As Washington succinctly put it, “I won’t go woke.” The news of […] More
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in Satire
Breaking: Alyssa Milano Kicked Out Of The Golden Globes Red Carpet, “Your Woke Presence Is Not Welcome Here.”
The glitz and glamour of the Golden Globes often captivate audiences worldwide, but for actress and activist Alyssa Milano, the 2024 event turned out to be a night of unexpected exclusion and embarrassment. In a surprising turn of events, Milano found herself on the receiving end of an unwelcome dismissal from the prestigious red carpet, […] More
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in Satire
Breaking: Robert De Niro to Leave the US, Says ‘I Get No Respect Here’
In a turn of events that has caught both his fans and critics off guard, Hollywood icon Robert De Niro has recently announced his intention to leave the United States, citing a lack of respect as his primary reason. This news, coming from one of cinema’s most enduring figures, opens a Pandora’s box of discussions […] More
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in Satire
Breaking: Academy Awards Chooses Sylvester Stallone Over Whoopi Goldberg for MC Role
In a surprising turn of events, the Academy Awards, one of the most prestigious events in the world of cinema, has decided to make a change that has caught the entertainment industry off guard. Whoopi Goldberg, a seasoned actress and comedian, who has been the master of ceremonies (MC) for the Oscars for several years, […] More
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Breaking: Tom Cruise to Go to Space This Year and Not Return
In an unprecedented move, transcending the boundaries of both cinema and sanity, Tom Cruise has announced that he will be venturing into the unknown cosmos aboard Elon Musk’s SpaceX Rocket – and he won’t be coming back! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, you heard it right: Mission Tom-possible is on, and this time, it’s interstellar. Elon […] More
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Breaking: Whoopi Goldberg Stands by Megan Rapinoe, ‘She’s Like A Sister’
In an unexpected twist that left both the sports and entertainment worlds buzzing, Whoopi Goldberg, the revered actress and co-host of “The View,” has extended an unlikely olive branch to none other than the outspoken soccer star, Megan Rapinoe. The unanticipated alliance comes on the heels of Rapinoe’s missed penalty kick during the World Cup […] More
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Breaking: Fellow Panelists Vote Whoopi Goldberg as the ‘Most Hated Person’ in Hollywood
In an absolutely bonkers turn of events that you couldn’t even fabricate if you tried, Whoopi Goldberg has been voted as the ‘Most Hated Person in Hollywood’ by her own fellow panelists on ‘The View’. That’s right, the stalwart of daytime television, the woman who has had her fingers in more Hollywood pies than a […] More
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Breaking: New ‘Barbie’ Movie Flops Badly At The Box Office Due To ‘Wokeness’
In a shocking turn of events, the highly-anticipated 2023 American fantasy-comedy, ‘Barbie,’ directed by the innovative Greta Gerwig, has stumbled and fallen flat at the box office, despite its star-studded cast and rave reviews from critics. The film boasts the exceptional acting talent of Margot Robbie as the eponymous character, Barbie, and Ryan Gosling as […] More
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New: Alyssa Milano Accuses Elon Musk for Her Lack of Acting Opportunities and Going Broke
Alyssa Milano, the renowned actress known for her roles in hit series like “Charmed” and “Who’s the Boss?” and her more recent activism, has emerged from a period of professional quietude with startling news. In a dramatic shift from her once thriving career, Milano revealed her struggles to secure acting roles and financial stability, pointing […] More
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in Featured
Breaking: Tom Cruise Worried That Elon Might Replace Him With ‘AI’
In a narrative twist so astonishing it could be straight out of a Hollywood sci-fi blockbuster, mega-star Tom Cruise is reportedly riddled with worry that tech maestro Elon Musk might replace him with an Artificial Intelligence (AI) actor. Yes, you read that right. Our very own ‘Mission Impossible’ hero is confronting his potential mission impossible. […] More
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Just In: Anti-Woke America’s Best Film ‘Sound of Freedom’ Smashes Box Office Records
In a surprising turn of events, ‘Sound of Freedom’, a movie recounting the daring exploits of former federal agent Tim Ballard and his mission to combat child trafficking in Colombia, has emerged as a box office hit. The film grossed an astonishing $41.7 million in its opening week and has achieved particular success in Texas, […] More